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I wish I were an Oscar Mayer weiner

That is what I truly wish to bee


Melissa and I are weird beyond reason. Do not even try to understand us. Some people think they're really weird...they have no idea.

"Don't think about anything. Just think about sex." - Scott
"I wanna scratch you." -Scott
"I'M TAKING A SHIT!" -Wesley
"I'm going to drool." -Sylvia
"Because every baby deserves nostrils." -Grace
"Wesley, do the fucking speech or I will speech your fucking." -Scott
"When I die and get cremated, I'm going to give YOU a little bottle of ME." -Jen Go
"I can't concentrate, you're too funny looking." -Catherine
"I'm laughing at her, not her joke." -Catherine
"I'm not gonna turn gay. That's gay." -Justin Chi
"My ego's the hottest thing around. It's just as hot as my eggo." -Howard
"Dad, this is Wesley. This is Scott. There is no white kid here." -Sylvia
"Animals are really ugly when they're big. Like me." -Catherine
"A lot of people don't go to davis because they don't want to be with cows. :( But california cows are happy. People are jerks." -Catherine
"She's short and fat and ugly." -Catherine

Nikita: I jammed my printer :[
Me: With what? If you don't say paper, then you're stupid.
Nikita: With my ruler.
David: Why are you so mean to crazy people?
David: Why are you so mean to crazy people?
Me: You just said that two times.
David: I wasn't sure I said it right the first time, so I said it again.